New Year’s Restoration
While many are familiar with New Year’s resolutions, my life experience knows them as the light and fluffy uncommittable goals that I say once and never follow through. I know that for some, maybe many of you, the pandemic was just last year right??? Nope, it will be four years ago this year, and it still feels like my brain and body are in recovery from the trauma. Each of us has life stressors, traumas, and insurmountable obstacles that either come and go or compound as time progresses.
For this blog post, I would like to shift attention away from the problem itself and possible solutions and redirect it inward. I ask you to reflect on the questions below and what they mean to you.
Do I feel restored?
Do I have capacity?
After my life hurdles are leaped over, do I feel replenished to take on the next one?
If I am honest, I would say there are many times I just keep pushing myself on to the next and the next without ever stopping. I know many of you can relate to that, especially when one hurdle is over, and you get bombarded with many more shortly after. As we look into this new year, I wanted to provide some simple strategies to keep ourselves focused on the restoration phase of our life journeys. This phase is essential at preserving our energy, productivity, and connection to ourselves.
PRIORITIZE YOU - In a life filled with many To Do’s, are YOU on your list? Set intentional time (even if five minutes) to pencil YOU in every day. The five minute bathroom break, the 15m express shower, the commute to and from a place, a massage, or mom/BFF date…can give those little precious rejuvenating moments to ourselves. By setting clear intentions and scheduling, we are more likely to commit to it and be better for it!
DELEGATE and RECRUIT - I know first hand how hard it can be to ask for help. It is vulnerable, and we feel this pressure to wear 100 hats. We ALL need help at times, and there is zero shame in asking those who can give the support we need to step in. If support is low or non-existent, you are not without hope! Maybe there is a community resource, a local mom group, or a gym with a childcare center…there are creative options out there so that you can take care of yourself and get the help you need.
GIVE YOURSELF GRACE - Give grace to yourself amidst life bombs. We are stretched thin, barely afloat, just doing what we can to get by, and THAT IS GOOD ENOUGH. We all know we can do more, but when bombed by multiple sources of stress we need to focus on preservation and keeping ourselves functioning. As the bombs eventually clear, we can dedicate time later to rest, recover, and restore. There is no shame in acknowledging that we cannot be ideal or superheroes. We are all doing the best we can and our best may be greatly reduced when bombarded by life.
ASSESS CAPACITY - My capacity is not 100 percent every day. Some days, I have 50 percent, 85, or 20. My best capacity is what it is. By assessing capacity regularly, it helps me keep track of what I sign up for and what I decline or delegate. As much as I would like to do it all, I cannot. Train yourself to respect your capacity, and try to avoid operating with a capacity deficit.
BE MINDFUL—NOT MIND-FULL - Take time to be in the present moment. Being mindful does not always mean meditation or a deep breathing practice. You can be mindful by grounding yourself with your body and your senses. How does the warm cup of coffee feel in your hand? Notice the swirls of cream…do they go clockwise or counterclockwise? People who engage in a regular mindfulness practice notice significant positive changes to their overall mental and physical wellness, such as improved sleep, reduced anxiety, and improved focus and attention.
RESPECT YOUR NEEDS - As we establish our own restoration practices, we need to be cognizant of the fact that we are all different in what we need. What takes one person a day to recharge…we might need a week or a month. One person can exude energy every day, and another struggles to find just one ounce to power through. Respect yourself and your needs even if your phase takes longer than another’s. Respecting our needs only benefits your healing and restoration trajectory.
Restoration is my intention for 2024 this year, and I hope many of you will find what you need to feel reinvigorated and excited about the year ahead!
If you would like to dive deeper into these skills and how you can implement them into your life, I encourage you to contact True North Counseling & Development at 859-740-7374 to work with a provider who can help guide you through these processes. Knowing the skills and implementing them can be two challenging feats, and we are determined to help you discover what an empowered life can look like for you!